Mastering Mental Time Travel

Mastering Mental Time Travel: Overcoming Fear Through Reflection, Vision, and Presence – YouTube
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T-4YxNBv5oU

Transcript:
(00:00) if you’re able to uh to really reflect on the past visualize the future what happens then is it opens up the present for you when you’re dwelling on the past you’re obsessing about the future what you’re doing is you’re compressing the present to non-existence you’re you’re neglecting it completely but when you’re reflecting on the past and you’re visualizing a powerful future what you’re doing is you’re creating space in the present you’re opening up that space
(00:29) to live in the present and in the present that’s where appreciation comes in hello everyone and welcome to the flow over fear podcast where it is our mission to help you to rise above fear and realize your ultimate potential in leadership and life I’m your host Adam Hill and it is my goal to share with you the human side of high performance my guests share their experience with fear anxiety struggle Challenge and most most importantly despite all of it how they Rose above it to achieve incredible results so if you’re ready to rise up
(01:09) let’s get started hey everyone welcome to flow over fear and today I want to go back to the future sorry that was my best Doc Brown impression and it wasn’t very good um and but no but seriously today I do want to talk about time travel and uh before you go out and buy your DeLorean which I’m not discouraging you from buying a DeLorean because that would be super awesome but before you go and do that this is not about that kind of time travel uh if you want to learn more about that you probably want to see an
(01:44) episode with Neil degrass Tyson or somebody that knows about astrophysics I do not but what I do know about is the time travel that we experience in our minds and this is something that we already do we already do a lot of I mean if you’ve ever thought like well if you’ve ever thought about the past right you’ve thought about your experiences you’ve had and and things that you’ve done in the past or you’ve thought about the future what you want to be and and things that are yet to come then you’ve time traveled in your
(02:17) mind so it’s something that we already do but the problem is is that a lot of times the reason we feel anxious or depressed or or we have these you know mental health challenges that we go through are because of how we time travel um a lot of times when we’re spending time in the past we’re dwelling on it you know we’re we’re we’re going into the past and thinking my gosh I shouldn’t have done that or we’re we’re ruminating on these experiences that we had that we wish had gone differently or
(02:51) or something that we can’t change but we’re sitting there or we’re looking at the future in terms of things we should do things that we need to do things that have to happen in the future and it makes us anxious so that when we’re when we’re obsessing on the future we’re living in anxiety and when we’re dwelling on the past we’re living depressed shameful or or some or or something else and what happens in that way when we’re living in the past and the present in those ways
(03:24) or the past and the future in those ways we have one foot in the past one foot in in the future as I’ve learned in sobriety that means is that we’re pissing on the present right the present we’re just neglecting because we’re spending so much time in the past and the future uh dwelling and obsessing that we’re neglecting the present moment when we do that we’re really shutting out our higher power we’re shutting out any kind of spiritual connection that we have because spiritual connection for
(03:53) regardless of what you believe it exists there is that spiritual energy there’s that there’s that powerful higher power energy that exists and it exists right now at no other time than right now and so that is uh something we miss out on and when we miss out on that when we miss out on that we start to feel hopeless because we can’t change the past and we don’t feel like we have any control over the future and so we feel hopeless we get frustrated and it brings us into that anxiety or that sadness
(04:31) um and I remember this was very much true for me while I was living in my alcoholism that this is an extreme example but when I was living in that my environment was not was not happy now let me just qualify that by saying I didn’t have by the environment I didn’t mean like my surroundings my surroundings were great I lived in a great Community had a great family I uh um you know things I had good things going for me but the environment in my mind that I was creating in was very very toxic um and a lot of that time was
(05:05) spent in the past thinking you know of all of the shameful things that I’ve done of how I should have behaved the blackouts the the the bad things that I felt that I did the the bad person that I was because of those experiences that I that I had um I wasn’t learning from them I was just just obsessing on this person that I was um and I was spending time in the future thinking I’m so frustrated that I that that I can’t get to where I want to get to that I wish I could be this person but I can’t because
(05:40) I don’t know what it takes and so I neglected that present and I put myself in a terrible toxic environment that you know led to me being an addict an alcoholic um and making those poor choices during that during that time and that of course that Al alcoholism and and drinking a lot fed on it because drinking helped me to take away the pain of living in the future and living in the past um it helped me to kind of numb that and that’s what continued me to me doing it my the environment that I was creating um and
(06:20) when I got sober when I went through alcohol exous when I found that community of support which again that power of community can’t be overstated it’s so so powerful I found my community in Alcoholics annonymous and when I found that I discovered within those first few steps that there is a higher power that’s looking out for us and and that we can let go of the things that we don’t have control over I.
(06:49) E the past and the future and we can control the things that we have that we that we have control over there’s that there’s that serenity prayer that says uh God grant me the serenity to accept the things that I cannot change the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference and I don’t know if I have that wisdom necessarily that that Divine divinely inspired wisdom but what I think that means is that letting go of things that we can’t control a lot of times means letting go of you know
(07:21) the things we can’t control in the past and letting go of the things we don’t have control of in the future and influencing and controlling the things that we can in the present um broadly speaking there’s you know there’s a lot of wiggle room in that of course that that there’s things we can’t control in the present of course and there’s things that you know we can influence in the future but broadly speaking that serenity prayer helps keep keep us into the present and when that happened when
(07:51) I started Living more in the present I actually started experiencing more of a relationship with my higher power I actually started coming to peace with my past so that I could learn from those experiences reflect on them learn from them and grow into the future into the future version of myself that I wanted to become and live that out today I learned to go from a toxic time traveler somebody who wasn’t wasn’t that great with time travel you know and and and wanted to do bad with time travel the Biff uh from from you know from uh uh to
(08:29) the Future to somebody who you know could time travel in a healthy way and what I learned you know over the over the course of those years was that there’s a subtle shift that we can make in terms of how we time Travel how we go into the past how we go into the future how we live out in the present that subtle shift that can make all the difference in our mindset and lead us to a more empowering future and that is this the first thing is how we how we travel into the past now as I mentioned before we tend to you know when we’re
(09:07) living in an unhealthy way we tend to dwell on the past dwell on the things that we can’t control or change from the past we live in those experiences where we think I shouldn’t have done that like maybe we had a bad conversation or or a uh a a conversation that went poorly with a colleague or a family member and we said some things we didn’t want to say and we look back at and say oh man I feel so much shame so much so much torment because I said those things or because that person said those things to
(09:38) me and and I’m just feeling so much resentment over it and we tend to dwell in that area in instead and that’s kind of our default that’s the that’s the mode of when we’re not really taking initiative or or or or being intentional about how we approach that but the alternative is with intentionality we can look into the past and we can reflect on it it’s a subtle shift in words instead of dwelling on it we reflect on it let’s reflect on the things of the past that we’ve experienced see what lessons we can take
(10:14) from it what lessons can we learn from the past from that experience from that conversation can we say all right was I in the wrong we start getting curious about it we start asking questions and this is where mindfulness comes in and one of the the the the the definition of mindset mindfulness that I like to use is that it is basically awareness and curiosity you become aware of it without judgment and you get curious about it so awareness without judgment and then curiosity so when we look back at the past we don’t want to judge ourselves
(10:53) because there’s no no productivity in that that judgment just leads to shame but we want to reflect on it and get curious about it so we’re aware of of how that’s feeling towards us we’re not going to judge the feeling that that we’re hit by but we’re going to look at that experience and ask the questions was I in the wrong did I say anything that I regret and that I should apologize for would will I or or um should I change the nature of this relationship in some way and and when we
(11:26) get curious on it that actually brings us into present and it it helps us to to build that relationship in the present and focus more on the things that we can control in that moment rather than things that we can’t in addition I mean we can do this on a broader level more than just conversations I like to I like to go on a vision reflection Retreat where part of that one full day of that Vision reflection Retreat that I go on is a reflection where I look back on the last quarter and I look back on all of the
(11:57) things that I did did I achieve my goals did I did I um did I accomplish what I want to accomplish and if I didn’t what what impacted it why didn’t I achieve it what can I change in the future that that can help me to impact that and that actually helps me to learn the lessons of the past and and bring them forward into the future instead of just dwelling in that past and just saying man that’s I’m I’m terrible because I didn’t achieve what I wanted to achieve I only did one of my goals and not all five or
(12:29) what whatever it is that you’re dwelling on that reflection side of it instead reflecting on it allows you to look objectively at your past and see how you can learn from it to become a better person today because it is all about how we are today and and then the second part of that is is you know once you have that reflection you can make those changes and in the past you’re no longer dwelling in the past you’re just reflecting on it um and then the second piece of how we can is how we travel into the
(13:04) future and a lot of times again how we travel into the future traditionally now is is we travel there thinking of what we should do what we need to do what what has to happen and we tend to think there non unintentionally and we dwell there with anxiety of like oh my gosh is this going to happen we get anxious or fearful about an uncertain future and remember that’s one of the primary fears that we feel that are non- danger fears is uncertainty that uncertainty exists in the future and so when we’re obsessing about
(13:40) that uncertainty and the things we don’t know that we don’t know well we get anxious we have that anxiety but again this is where intentionality comes in because when we’re not intentional about that future tripping which is what that’s called um when we’re not intentional about it we tend to fall into that trap of of getting anxious and trying to control the things that we can’t control uh I used to do this a lot when I when I was in Triathlon and even at that time uh I I would look
(14:16) obsessively with at the weather before an event like before an event um I was always obsessed about the weather it’s like oh is it going to rain is it going to be windy on the swim is is the water going to be rough of course I can’t control the weather I can’t control those outcomes in the future but I was obsessing about them and it was just taking at my time and it was causing me anxiety and think about that if you’re so focused and obsessing on the things that are outside of your control how
(14:45) much of your life are you wasting letting that those ideas that you can’t control live rentree in your mind now I’m not going to say that this is an easy process to change that mindset it’s not I still have problem problems with this all the time I still obsessively think about the future um and I and I don’t and and I shouldn’t but the point is is that you get intentional about it from time to time and you build that muscle and that intentionality when we’re thinking about the future turns into Vision so just as
(15:20) looking at the past with intention is reflection looking at the future with intention is changing that Obsession to Vision really really identifying really clarifying really getting clear on that ideal outcome that you want whether it be at an event that’s going to happen a week from now or 10 years from now visualizing that ideal future for you visual putting yourself in that place making the future the present really for you and and putting yourself in that place and this is why it takes intentionality is because it takes
(15:56) effort to actually visualize that future for yourself takes effort because we’ve never been there we’re creating that we’re imagining that in our minds but we’re creating that P powerful vision for ourselves of the future that we can take ourselves to and it can be it can be empowering to take us there this is the second day of my vision reflection Retreat I focus on Vision I really I take an entire day a journal to to to identify the the the things that I want my the people I want to serve the ways
(16:30) in which I want to serve and contribute in the future and the relationships that I want to have and I I put myself there with the sights The Sounds the smells and the everything that that I can I can add there so that I could put myself there visually and it creating that powerful Vision while that doesn’t mean that it’s absolutely going to unfold the way that you want it to what it is is it’s you able to control to the extent that you can the visualization of the future that you want to achieve and when we the more
(17:07) that we put ourselves in those visualizing visualized States the more our minds gravitate towards moving in that direction the more our actions will follow and of course we have to take the actions but the more our actions in the present will follow that visual because we’re we’re living there I mean this really comes down to one of the principles that Tony Robbins teaches is is what what you where where your focus goes your energy flows and this is absolutely true 100% true that you that when you put your focus on
(17:40) something your energy will flow there it’s the same thing that if you’re if you’re obsessing in the future if you’re living an obsession with the future where you’re where um you’re you’re living you’re you know you’re feeling that anxiety about the future you’re bringing more anxiety into your present that’s what your energy is creating so your energy is going in that direction it’s going to produce more anxiety but if you create a powerful future for yourself if you control the
(18:06) narrative in the future then your energy will gravitate towards that positivity it takes a lot of work and a lot of effort but it works um if you work it and I suggest that you take this take it on a daily basis in your morning practice introduce a visualization method where you just put yourself into the environment that you want to put yourself in try to try to acknowledge when you are obsessing on the past or or or dwelling on the past and obsessing on the future and just just mark it and take yourself out of it and
(18:43) revisualization [Music] happens then is it opens up the present for you you know whereas when you’re obsessing on the P or when you’re dwelling on the past I keep making that mistake it’s dwelling on the past not obsessing about the past sorry about that but you’re dwelling when you’re dwelling on the past you’re obsessing about the future what you’re doing is you’re compressing the present to non-existence you’re you’re neglecting it completely but when you’re reflecting
(19:21) on the past and you’re visualizing a powerful future what you’re doing is you’re creating space in the present you’re opening up that space to live in the present and in the present that’s where appreciation comes in you just want to be grateful for this moment this moment that’s happening right now because you’re alive you’re breathing your heart is beating and that’s that’s something to be appreciated this present moment lives in the infinite universe is this single moment in time that you will never get
(19:56) back and there’s something to be grateful for in that moment as long as you appreciate that moment then you know you’re going then you can’t really go wrong with life in general you know um and again this isn’t a perfect science this you’re it’s going to fail we are made to travel in time back to that negative head space that we have in the past we’re we’re meant to travel back in time or forward in time and obsess about the future that happens from time to time and that’s okay it’s
(20:29) not it’s about it’s not about feeling the shame of not doing this perfectly it’s all about practicing it being intentional about it so that you can make the positive impacts and you can make this present moment something more amazing and terrific than it is right now you have the power to make this moment right now amazing if you can reflect on the past and learn from the lessons and visualize a powerful future for yourself that will create a perfect powerful present moment and that is a moment where Spirit where this where
(21:10) where spirituality exists where God lives right in the present and I I’m I’m grateful today that I get to have that relationship in the present as often as I do even though I still live from time to time obsessively in the past thinking about things that I should have done or I shouldn’t have done and wish that I could have done things differently and I and I often still obsess about the future and the unknown and the uncertainty that exists there and obsessing about what I don’t know but I’m more intentional today and
(21:48) I would encourage you to be more intentional about that too couple of action items that I would I would suggest again on a daily basis do that daily Vision reflection where you’re reflecting maybe on your day this come this can come from the five- minute Journal five minute Journal is a great way to do this because it asks the right questions for that like what would make today great you know what am I grateful for today it actually takes those prompts of what’s in the present moment what is the future and the immediate
(22:16) future today that that would make today great and then it has you reflect at the end of the day reflect on on the things that happen during the course of the day and learn from them and apply those to the Future so I I recommend that on a daily basis and even more broadly on a quarterly or semiannual basis do a retreat go just for a couple of days get away from your house and do a vision reflection Retreat where you where you spend a day reflecting on the last quarter or the last year or however frequently you want to do it and then
(22:47) you you visualize a powerful future um on that second day and you create that I actually have a prompt for for this uh for this vision reflection Retreat that if you if this is something that you want um to participate in I can send you that prompt I can send you those questions and and the things that how to how to actually create your own Vision reflection Retreat so just reach out to me and ask and I’ll I’ll I’ll give that to you for free as a thank you for listening to this show and speaking of
(23:21) listening to this show if you like this episode please rate it please subscribe and and rate this show give me uh and uh if you like this episode also share it with a friend who might need it if if you feel that somebody can benefit from this message share it with them and uh I thank you for listening to this method me message I know that if you’re able to time travel in a healthy way um you’re going to you’re going to start having more appreciation for life you’re G to start to start to see uh those changes start to take place
(23:56) in your life uh you’ll start to gravitate more towards the right relationships the right the the right things and the right uh um and the right ways of living and and hopefully you’ll be able to experience God a little bit more in your life um so I appreciate you joining me here today and I hope one day you’re able to get that DeLorean that you’ve always wanted but until that day comes Let’s uh uh reflect on the past let’s visualize the future and appreciate the present thanks for joining me today see you next time hey
(24:29) everyone Thanks for tuning in to the flow over fear podcast if you’d like to learn more about getting into flow and learn the foundations of flow I have a free video series on my website at www. adamcliffordhill.com called the foundations of flow feel free to go there and download it and start your journey to Rising above fear and achieving greater flow in your life if you like this episode and I’m guessing you did if you stuck around for this long then please do me a favor and hit the Subscribe button and you will
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